Rut-tastic

I know, It's been awhile...longer than awhile. But here I am.. in a rut. A hair rut, a style rut, just a rut in general. When I was younger, even just a year ago, I would basically get a high off of purchasing new clothing, hair products, or makeup. Now... I have a panic attack every time I spend money. Which is stupid because 1. I am perfect fine dropping $200 on making my freaking fireplace mantel look attractive and 2. I just told my boyfriend we could purchase a new 60'' plasma tv for his birthday. Apparently, cosmetic appearance for our house, and making things match (slowly but surely) is no big deal to me. But I can't justify me needing new clothes or hair products. Hair products... I can understand because I have a canvas shoe rack full of hair products that I need to get through, so a no-buy makes sense until I get through all of these products... but clothes... SERIOUSLY. why... I wear the same outfits each week practically.

I need some inspiration with clothing. I think I have in a way lost my style. My thinking is that because I'm about to be in such an odd place, that I can't justify the purchases. Come May, I'll be doing my internship, and then hopefully my big girl job. Purchasing cute clothing to go to class in and such, but then I'll just have to purchase more professional clothing in a few months anyways. I just can't justify it, but I legit wear some pair of jeans, a shirt, and a cardigan practically everyday. I think I need to invest in things more my style, but I never want to spend the money on it which makes no sense. I have the money, so why not save up some to spend on myself for a new outfit or two every once in awhile? I have my eye on these shoes.... but the boyfriend HATES them, and I of course am in love with them, but I can't justify spending $40 on these shoes, if I don't wear them very often. This is way too silly because I used to spend obnoxious amounts of money on clothing each week because why the hell not? And now.. I have no idea what I'm doing

Also I've been doing my hair curly everyday (washing it once in a while) and I really like that, but sometimes I want to put it up.. Maybe I should attempt to doing some hair styles where I put my hair up? I was thinking a sock bun, but using one of my boyfriend's daughter's socks (she's 3) because my hair is so short... anybody know if that will work??

Help me out of this rut... going to target hopefully later to check things out... fingers crossed I feel good enough to get something new and attractive.

XO-Stacey